A Family Wedding Followed by a Mystery Wedding

By Ann Ipock

After enjoying the wedding of her dreams, our daughter, Katie, and her new husband, Michael, have settled into marital bliss. I, on the other hand, can’t get used to her new last name, Voulgaris, but I will eventually. I can’t get used to her not living here with us, but I will eventually. I can’t get used to us being invited over for meals at their house – Katie is NOT a cook, though Michael is – but I will eventually. In fact, starting with their very first major holiday, Thanksgiving, they’re cooking up a feast for us. THAT, I can get used to!

Weddings are a beautiful thing. They bring family and friends together, they create a union between husband and wife, they serve as a channel for LOTS of wedding gifts. And if you’re lucky like us – most of the people that you invite do attend. We had a little over the standard 80% acceptance, but it seemed like so many more. That’s because Michael and his dad, Nick, took turns performing a special Greek dance. Talk about a packed room, but an appreciative, happy and entertained crowd! Opa!

But, y’all, please answer this for me: what happens when you get invited to a wedding, and you don’t seem to KNOW the couple? This did not happen at Katie and Michael’s wedding (that I’m aware of), but it’s happening with us now. I just received a “Save the Date” card from a couple that I absolutely do not know. Our names and address are hand-written on the charming, colorful, whimsical post card. One thing’s for sure: they have great taste! The invitation is on card stock with ornate turquoise, ivory and white color themes, depicting ocean waves, sand and birds.

Our name and address are printed correctly, so I know it wasn’t a mass-mailed, solicitation type of mail – of course not, not for a wedding! For a short sale on a house, yes; but not for a wedding. One hint: our name is written in a beautiful manuscript, similar to the perfect style drafters use on surveys and plans. And the ink is a lovely turquoise to match the front of the card.

I’ve asked everyone I can think of if they know this couple, and I’ve had a resounding, “No!” So what am I to do? Oh, and to top it off, this is a destination wedding in Rincon, Puerto Rico, next May! The postcard showed a website for this engaged couple, and I immediately looked that up. She has long blonde hair, and he has short brown hair. That’s the only clue I can obtain – that, and they love surfing and the great outdoors. In order to avoid embarrassment, I won’t tell you their first names, but I will say they are common ones. I’m guessing their ages are mid to late 20’s. Katie, our 28-year old daughter, does not know them – I’ve shown her the invite and their website.

When I showed this card to hub-Russ, he was the first to say, “Well, it’s for dang sure we aren’t going to Puerto Rico for a wedding.” But I teased him, “Well, why not? I’ve never been there. It would be a great vacation!” Russell replied, “But, Ann, think about it! We don’t know them!” My rebuttal, “Okay, you have a point, but the way I look at it is: they know us, and they KNOW that they know us. We don’t know them but they don’t KNOW that we don’t know them (evidently). So why not meet them half-way, so to speak, at their wedding? Kind of like, Surprise!” Russell just rolled his eyes and continued cleaning his golf clubs with that scruffy old toothbrush. I also reminded him there are wonderful golf courses in Puerto Rico. He still wasn’t interested. Men!

One other clue: their return address is on the back of the card. He/she/they currently live at Wrightsville Beach, a short fifteen-minute drive from our home. I could go spy on them. Y’know, watch them come and go. Pretend to bump into them on the sidewalk IF they have a sidewalk. But that is just SO obvious, right? And though I have been called Mrs. Kravitz from the popular TV show, “Bewitched,” I prefer to spy only in my own neighborhood.

At the very least, I plan to send them a gift, except, where are they registered? And, how shall I sign the card? “Happy wedding day from your long-lost pals, Ann and Russell.” Oh, no, wait! I keep forgetting that they know Us but we don’t know Them. I’ve done a Facebook search, a Google search and again, thoroughly read their website. Ack!

So if you are reading this now and know who this couple is – hey, you may BE this couple – then please by all means tell me who you are, so we’ll both know. Okay? Confused? Yeah, me too.

About this writer

  • Ann Ipock Ann Ipock, the first Sasee hat recipient, is the author of the “Life is Short” humor trilogy. She currently writes for four publications and lives in Wilmington, North Carolina, with her husband, Russell. www.annipock.com

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