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Janey Womeldorf

How Long is Your Timeline?

By Janey Womeldorf

“I want you to draw a line,” the instructor said. “Write a zero at one end, and the age at the other you think you will die.” I wrote 77. I was taking a lifestyle-improvement class and the line represented our life’s timeline that you then divided up into seven-year periods. (There was lots of […]

Confessions of a Food Lover

By Janey Womeldorf

“Do you ever emotional eat?” my friend asked nervously. Years ago, I would have squirmed at the question, unready to admit the answer to myself, let alone to another woman. But those days are gone. “Oh my gosh, all the time,” I chuckled comfortably. “Really,” she gulped, more shocked than relieved. “Of course. Who doesn’t?” […]

Why is it that when you have guests over for dinner, and they only eat half their food, one thought consumes you after they leave: What was wrong with the other half? Of course, what we should really do is view the glass as half-full not half-empty; at least they enjoyed the chicken even if […]

It took just one sentence of Elizabeth Gilbert’s book, Eat, Pray, Love, to stop me in my tracks. The words leapt off the page at me, and I felt my whole body sag. “No, no, not now,” I pleaded to myself, “all I want to do right now is not think.” I was desperate for […]

Did I Do the Right Thing?

By Janey Womeldorf

A man drove up to me in the Wal-Mart parking lot three weeks ago. He had two young boys in the back of his car and told me he had driven into town from the next state over to attend his grandmother’s funeral. He needed gas to get back home and asked me for money. […]

In marriage, certain rules go without saying: Love, fidelity, honesty and respect. However, it is the second set of rules – the unwritten ones – that cause havoc or harmony behind closed doors. The first unwritten rule reveals itself months into the marriage – usually around the time the happy couple, or should I say […]

Fashion, Aging, and Purging

By Janey Womeldorf

One great thing about getting older is realizing that if you wait long enough, your clothes will come back in fashion. The downside is, that it means that our closets are full of dated, but beloved, gems that we no longer wear, can’t get rid of, but hope that one day their day in the […]

Never Invite a Vegetarian

By Janey Womeldorf

A couple wants to host a dinner party for friends. They discover that one of the wives is a vegetarian, at which point they decide they have four choices: One, cook a separate meal for the veg-head; two, re-do the menu and make the entire meal vegetarian; three, pretend they didn’t know, or forgot, and […]

The Safe Place

By Janey Womeldorf

I recently put my cell-phone charger in a “safe place.” It was during our last move and I knew my fully-charged phone would last until the new house. The safe place is a spot that exists in every home, similar to the Bermuda Triangle. Growing up, my Mom was forever putting stuff there – most […]

Love, Money and Presents

By Janey Womeldorf

When Grandma was 17, she climbed out of her bedroom window, in the middle of the night, wearing as many of her clothes as possible. She was running away to marry the orphaned, farmer boy she had fallen in love with but knew her parents would never approve of. The year was 1933, and the […]

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