Clear the Clutter

By Tammy Darling

With every season, there are things I love…and things I could do without. Like the fallen leaves of autumn, for example, those I could do without. Oh, the clutter!

Fall happens to be my favorite season. The fallen leaves though, not a fan. You see, there’s only so much clutter I can take before it all starts to stress me out. Clearing the clutter becomes paramount.

Here’s the thing: something can be beautiful, beneficial even, and still need to be cleaned up, gotten rid of, or otherwise regimented. There, I said it.

My yard isn’t the only thing that can become cluttered. My home, mind, soul, and relationships can also become cluttered and need some serious going through. And the new year is the perfect time for such decluttering.

Home

I had an immaculate home B.C. (Before Children). It was so clean, in fact, that extended family members were concerned when the children started coming along.

I got over it.

I got over it, that is, until the clutter began to take its toll on my mental and emotional state. Like the fallen leaves, there was only so much I could take. I did what I could, but I also didn’t get all OCD about it. Life is all about balance.

Now that I’m older and my children and their myriad Legos have flown the nest, I’m back to my super organized ways simply because I have more time to deep clean and clear the clutter. Every new year, I go through the house, top to bottom. Every drawer and every closet gets a clutter inspection. If I haven’t used it in the past year, out it goes. Less really is more.

Apart from yearly clutter checks, I stay on top of things daily. It isn’t difficult to toss the junk mail into the trash can immediately upon entering the house, to fold the laundry while returning a call to my sister, or to load the dishwasher while cooking.

I’m a firm believer that a person’s home should be a place of beauty and peace. Keeping the clutter to a minimum fosters both beauty and peace.

Mind

Clearing the clutter of my mind has become very important to me in recent years. Because my mother suffered from dementia for thirteen years, I want my mind in tip-top shape, and thankfully, there are many ways I can do that. Clearing the clutter is one of those ways.

I’ve become very “mindful” of what I think about and allow to take up space in my brain. If it won’t matter in ten minutes or ten years, I don’t need to dwell on it now. It really is that simple.

Just this week, someone I love dearly said something hurtful to me. I could have taken offense and allowed it to run on repeat in my mind, but I chose to toss it out and move on instead. I knew he was tired and under pressure learning a new job, so I offered grace instead and, subsequently, maintained my own peace of mind.

Soul

Anger, resentment, bitterness, and grudges… can all cause a plethora of soul clutter. Been there, done that. But there’s a remedy: I can flip the script and choose differently. I can’t live on autopilot; I must make deliberate, healthy choices. Like that unwanted, unused wedding gift from dear Aunt Sally that I’ve held on to for twenty years, I need to let it go.

The choices I make have consequences. No new news there. But the thing is that I tend to make choices as though there are no consequences. And then I wonder why my soul feels so cluttered. Keeping clutter from building up in my soul requires making good choices. Good choices plus subsequent good consequences equals less clutter.

Wounds can cause a lot of soul clutter that needs deep cleaning and healing. Hurt people hurt people, and the cycle continues until someone decides to stop it. Several years ago, I traversed six states for a three-day inner healing conference and then spent three additional days at the ocean to just…breathe. I felt so clean, so clear of the clutter that had built up over the years.

Relationships

Relationships with others wrapped in a cocoon of humanness can cause no small amount of clutter. Not every relationship is meant to be deep or even lasting. Some people are in my life only for a season; wisdom knows the difference.

 Relational forgiveness is the absolute best clutter cleanser. When I hold on to hurts and offense, the clutter accumulates and develops roots of bitterness and resentment that are more difficult to remove.

Years ago, I began to zone in on forgiving everyone I could think of who in some way hurt or offended me. I even forgave myself. Talk about clearing the clutter! I don’t think I truly realized how much unforgiveness clutter I had until I deliberately and specifically forgave one-by-one and not just a general, “I forgive everyone who ever hurt me.” The clutter in my home isn’t cleared all at once but room by room; likewise, the clutter in my relationships must be cleared person by person.

Taking Action

Clearing the clutter starts with a single action. When I take that first step, the rest falls into place. Beginning is as simple as a single action. Once taken, that action becomes clarity, and clarity becomes motivation, and motivation allows me to do what I previously couldn’t do…it enables me to clear the clutter.