\u201cThis is the other half of dumb and dumber calling!\u201d I announced after my husband answered his cell phone. \u201cYou got a minute?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI\u2019m in the middle of dictating\u2026\u201d he sighed sounding vexed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cBut, you are finished seeing patients?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYes.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWell, I just thought I should tell you that if I get shot by police, it\u2019s not my fault.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWhat?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIt\u2019s like this: I have been in the house all day with the men working on the back deck and I thought since they finally left, I\u2019d take the dogs for a walk, but since it\u2019s so hilly out here, I thought I\u2019d drive them down to the fitness center where the land is flat and walk there.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I heard him sigh deeply.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cAnd so I grabbed my keys to the car, well actually the fob, and the ones to the house and the leashes. I carried the dogs and threw them in the back seat and then threw my cell in the front passenger side. Suddenly, I heard this beeping sound and I saw a red-light flashing, so I looked down at my phone in the passenger side, and it said 911.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYou dialed 911?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cNO! I didn\u2019t dial anything. Anyway, I pressed the red phone icon to cancel, but the dispatcher called me back immediately. I answered all her questions regarding my name, address, and why 911 was dialed. She kept insisting I\u2019d dialed 911, and I kept insisting I had not. And I asked her if there is some way that a phone can dial the police without your doing it, and she just said that a policeman would be by. I told her I was planning on going to the fitness center and she said that maybe he\u2019ll just call. So, I called you. What do you think?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cSomething in your bag of a pocketbook hit the phone and somehow alerted the police.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI told you. I didn\u2019t take a purse. I threw the cell on the seat.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cI think they\u2019ll send a policeman.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cDang. Bye!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I took the dachshunds out of the back seat and put their leashes on and walked them to the end of the driveway, and then I took my phone out and texted a friend who is savvier about cells than I. I wanted to see if she knew how this happened.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Sure enough, a police car turned into my driveway.
\u201cAre you on the phone?\u201d the policewoman asked. There I stood in my pandemic fashion: ragged looking jogging pants with the hems out, a stained T-shirt from a few summers ago, and old sneakers in a garish color my husband bought for me for Christmas because they were reduced, probably due to the god awful hue. (If it weren\u2019t for this pandemic, I\u2019d have never worn them as I wouldn\u2019t want to be seen out in them.)<\/p>\n\n\n\n
She asked me if I was the one who called 911. I went through my saga as to how I didn\u2019t dial anyone, and I know a few years ago when I was dialing 919 for the area code, I paused and sure enough they sent the police out despite my telling them I wasn\u2019t phoning for help. She listened to my tale where I swore, I had not phoned the police, not even by accident. She said that there is a SOS feature on the iPhone located on the side and you can activate it by pressing that button, but it\u2019s not easy to do. It must be held down.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I told her I didn\u2019t hold the side buttons down and I have no idea how this happened, unless when I was holding the dachshunds, I accidentally pressed it down or their bodies pressed it down. I said I was very sorry she came out, but there was no emergency.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
She smiled, turned around in my driveway, and went on her way.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I loaded the dachshunds in the car and drove to the fitness center to walk them as I had originally planned forty minutes earlier.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Now what did I learn from this misadventure? If you are like me and technologically challenged, learn about this SOS button on your cell phone so you don\u2019t accidentally press it and set off alarms bothering the police with your non-urgent stupidity.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Yet, there is a silver lining to this snafu\u2013it\u2019ll give the police officers something to chuckle over in between doing their difficult and dangerous jobs.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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