by Kerry Gunn-Black<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Hong Kong \u2013 one of the most populated places on earth. For someone who had never been to Asia before, and who lived in a small Scottish hamlet with a population of circa six hundred people, it was daunting. But I was in good hands. My \u201cnew\u201d boyfriend, Ben, was a seasoned traveller. I was sure I\u2019d be fine. More than fine. We\u2019d been seeing each other for six blissfully argument-free months and this was to be our first holiday together. I couldn\u2019t wait!<\/p>\n\n\n\n
We congratulated ourselves on how smoothly everything had gone. Asia, we decided smugly, had travel absolutely nailed. Flights on time. Connections seamless. Everyone polite, efficient, calm. We arrived at Hong Kong International Airport, waited patiently at the luggage carousel, and watched as our<\/p>\n\n\n\n
enormous suitcases appeared quickly in front of us. No pushing. No shoving. No British-style passive-aggressive sighing. Just order.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
We loaded our worldly possessions onto a trolley and set off to find the Airport Express. A train was waiting. We sat down, triumphant, basking in the glow of our own competence.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Then Ben looked at me and asked, quietly, \u201cWhere\u2019s your bag?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWhat bag?\u201d I replied. My heart leapt from its normal resting place to my mouth before settling again as I patted my familiar leather handbag on my lap, which contained my passport.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cYour suitcase,\u201d he clarified.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The heart returned. It met my teeth in an effort to leave my body.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cOh my GOD,\u201d I screeched, leaping up and sprinting off the train, abandoning Ben to deal with the remaining luggage. I hadn\u2019t put my suitcase on the trolley. I had simply\u2026 left it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I ran back into the terminal at full tilt, directly against the one-way system, where I was promptly<\/p>\n\n\n\n
intercepted by two armed guards who very nearly tackled me to the ground. I wasn\u2019t inclined to argue with men whose rifles were inches from my face. Unfortunately, their English and my Cantonese were equally non-existent.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I attempted to mime \u201cforgotten suitcase\u201d through frantic gestures and something resembling interpretive dance. It was like a high-stakes game of charades \u2014 with guns.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Eventually, a manager intervened. He understood my explanation, escorted me back to the carousel, and \u2014 trailed closely by Hong Kong\u2019s answer to Rambo \u2014 watched as I spotted my abandoned suitcase sitting exactly where I\u2019d left it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Relief flooded through me. I hadn\u2019t been arrested or shot, and equally importantly, I hadn\u2019t had to endure two weeks in Southeast Asia without hair straighteners and anti-frizz serum. Nobody needed to see that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ben, however, was not relieved. He looked at me with something bordering on disgust. It became<\/p>\n\n\n\n
immediately clear that he did not find this incident cute or endearing. This was not a funny holiday anecdote to him. I was irresponsible. I\u2019d assumed our first trip together would be romantic. Revealing, yes \u2014 but in a good way. I hadn\u2019t realised it would reveal Ben marching me around a range of tourist spots, rapidly scoring items off a \u201cto see\u201d spreadsheet and turning our idyllic holiday into a box-ticking exercise.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
After two very rushed days in Hong Kong where I trailed several steps behind Ben at all times, struggling to keep up with his speed-walker pace, we arrived in Vietnam. I wasn\u2019t prepared for how beautiful it would be. Hoi An glowed at night during the Full Moon Festival, with candles flickering inside coloured<\/p>\n\n\n\n
lanterns that drifted slowly down the river. It was the sort of moment that should have been profoundly romantic. However, Ben was sulking because I\u2019d failed to take a photo of him launching his lantern. I<\/p>\n\n\n\n
smiled sweetly at him as I pictured him tumbling into the water.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
The Vietnamese food was extraordinary. Pho that made me rethink every soup I\u2019d ever made, and curries fragrant and comforting. We took a spring roll class, which I adored. Ben, predictably, did not.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
When his rolls refused to cooperate, he became increasingly irate. I resisted the urge to force his badly packed appetiser up his nostril.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
In the old town we had clothes made for us from scratch. Tailors measured us and guided us through fabrics and patterns. I felt like a wealthy socialite. I\u2019d never owned anything one-of-a-kind before. It was intoxicating.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
We went to Ha Long Bay and stayed overnight on a boat. The scenery at the UNESCO World Heritage Site was spectacular. The wine flowed freely. Mostly because drinking heavily was the only way I could<\/p>\n\n\n\n
tolerate Ben by that point. We racked up an impressive bar bill, which felt like fair compensation for my emotional labour.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
By the time we were due to fly home, I felt tired in a way sleep couldn\u2019t fix. Then the zip on Ben\u2019s suitcase broke. This, apparently, was a catastrophe.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Since my case was lockable and destined for the hold, he began forcing as much of his luggage into it as possible. When it wouldn\u2019t all fit, he hovered impatiently over me as I tried to fix his broken zip. I couldn\u2019t. He grew angrier, convinced I hadn\u2019t tried hard enough. I was certain that if I overstuffed my case, my zip would break too \u2014 and then we\u2019d really be in trouble. Ben ranted about how I hadn\u2019t helped him when he\u2019d needed it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I was speechless \u2014 nobody had spoken to me like this in my life.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Sensing my mood, he eventually apologised in the departure lounge. To keep the peace, I accepted. But something had shifted. I\u2019d logged it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Karma was on my side when we checked into the flight too late to get seats together.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
I tried to arrange my features into an expression resembling disappointment, while internally<\/p>\n\n\n\n
cartwheeling into my window seat beside a pleasant couple. For fourteen glorious hours, I watched box sets and enjoyed the novelty of silence.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Ben visited my row several times to complain about his seat at the back of the plane \u2014 surrounded by loud passengers who chatted constantly and bumped his chair. I nodded sympathetically, waiting for him to leave so I could return to The White Lotus<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n When the plane landed in Edinburgh, I\u2019d decided.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Some people learn relationships aren\u2019t right over months or years. It only took me one long-haul flight and a broken suitcase zip.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The moment I arrived home, I ended it and bid him a fond \u201ctam biet\u201d as we say in Vietnam. He had the nerve to look shocked that I could possibly reject him based on his appalling holiday behaviour. I shook my head in bewilderment, and congratulated myself on making the right decision \u2026 eventually.<\/p>\n\n\n\n First holidays tell you everything. You just have to listen to them.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" by Kerry Gunn-Black Hong Kong \u2013 one of the most populated places on earth. For someone who had never been to Asia before, and who lived in a small Scottish […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":23353,"menu_order":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_tec_requires_first_save":true,"_gspb_post_css":"","_EventAllDay":false,"_EventTimezone":"","_EventStartDate":"","_EventEndDate":"","_EventStartDateUTC":"","_EventEndDateUTC":"","_EventShowMap":false,"_EventShowMapLink":false,"_EventURL":"","_EventCost":"","_EventCostDescription":"","_EventCurrencySymbol":"","_EventCurrencyCode":"","_EventCurrencyPosition":"","_EventDateTimeSeparator":"","_EventTimeRangeSeparator":"","_EventOrganizerID":[],"_EventVenueID":[],"_OrganizerEmail":"","_OrganizerPhone":"","_OrganizerWebsite":"","_VenueAddress":"","_VenueCity":"","_VenueCountry":"","_VenueProvince":"","_VenueState":"","_VenueZip":"","_VenuePhone":"","_VenueURL":"","_VenueStateProvince":"","_VenueLat":"","_VenueLng":"","_VenueShowMap":false,"_VenueShowMapLink":false,"_tribe_blocks_recurrence_rules":"","_tribe_blocks_recurrence_description":"","_tribe_blocks_recurrence_exclusions":"","footnotes":""},"essay_type":[46],"essay-category":[91],"class_list":["post-23352","essay","type-essay","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","essay_type-features","essay-category-health-beauty"],"blocksy_meta":[],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/sasee.com\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/essay\/23352","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/sasee.com\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/essay"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/sasee.com\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/essay"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sasee.com\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/7"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sasee.com\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=23352"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/sasee.com\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/essay\/23352\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sasee.com\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/23353"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/sasee.com\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=23352"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"essay_type","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sasee.com\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/essay_type?post=23352"},{"taxonomy":"essay-category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/sasee.com\/ro\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/essay-category?post=23352"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}